Tag: fiction

  • ATTACK OF THE KILLER TOMATOES (1978) Movie Review – Is It Worth Watching?

    Attack of the Killer Tomatoes is one of those movies that’s like: “Have I seen this movie?” Have I seen part of it, all of it, or NONE of it? I feel certain that I’ve at least seen the cartoon version. I wanted to give a focused watch of Attack of the Killer Tomatoes (1978) and decide what I REALLY thought of this movie.

    There were A LOT of tomatoes in the film. It was just nonstop. I am very good at math (despite having such a low IQ), but even I couldn’t count the number of tomatoes on screen. We’re only talking addition here! That’s just plus one each time! So that really tells you something about the sheer volume of tomatoes involved. Now, some critics may hold the opposite viewpoint and say there weren’t NEARLY ENOUGH tomatoes. I can’t tell you not to believe them, because Dis Drawma Kingg believes we should all interpret information ourselves and form our own opinions! If I say something stoopid and another person says something stoopider, ONLY YOU can decide which one was a greater waste of your time!

    Break time for an unrelated superhero story:

    William Aris became a superhero 2 years ago, but he doesn’t know it yet. One day he woke up with his head feeling a bit off, and he now had the power of persuasion! However, after all this time he still hasn’t figured out that he possesses these superhuman abilities! He just goes about his normal life, oblivious to what is really happening in his social interactions.

    Monday Morning – William is getting his normal coffee-before-work. He is next in line at the Possibly Good Coffee House when the famous local barista, Katie Nightfire, says:

    Katie Nightfire:  What will it be today? 

    William Aris: Can I have a house coffee? 

    Katie Nightfire: Sure! Here you go. Have a nice day! 

    William Aris: But I haven’t paid yet. 

    Katie Nightfire: Well you asked if you could have one, and I agreed. No need to give me any money. 

    William Aris: But I WANT to pay you. Can I please pay you? 

    Katie Nightfire: Well I’ll be… I suppose you can.

    Things like this happened all the time to William without him realizing the cause. Luckily, he had a fairly calm and relaxed personality. In terms of his personal morals — he held the principle: “Whenever confronted with choosing good or evil, it probably made sense to choose good.” So of all the people in the world that could have received this great power, we actually got lucky in a way with William. Eventually he would find out that he had powers and would even become known as an accomplished superhero that saves innocent lives!   

    To be continued in DRAWMA KINGG SIDEQUEST #2…

    Final Tomato Thoughts: 6/10 Crowns if I let myself write off the tasteless parts as unremarkable for the time period. It was an impressive film for the size of the budget. I was also impressed with the level of effort they put into areas such as the soldier dance scene. I was in no way blown away by Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, but I can understand its historical significance when it comes to intentionally campy horror movies. Is it worth watching? Ehhh… probably only if you particularly like that sub genre of horror or if you want to see how a movie can be made without a multi-million dollar budget.

  • DRAWMA KINGG SIDEQUEST #1 [Not A Movie Review] – THE CONCLUSION OF BAN SMITH IN THE RAIN

    Ban passes through the stare of the massive gate to the hilltop area. The storm is worsening. Ban doubts the rain is anywhere close to its peak yet, and now the winds are starting to become overbearing. He was almost in sight of his goal, the hilltop cabin.

    There would be no more chase. Aether Platinum was there, weapon in hand. He knew this day was inevitable. Aether Platinum was a man with a very different point of view in life than Ban Smith. The two intellects would now collide.

    Aether Platinum: I see Rodust must have talked.

    Ban: Yeah, but you wouldn’t believe the price!

    Aether: You would be surprised what I would or wouldn’t believe!

    Ban: I know you committed those crimes. I put it all together.

    Aether: I won’t insult you by denying it, Ban. You are the only one that saw how these events were connected.

    Ban: But I still haven’t figured out WHY! Tell me WHY you did it! I have to know!

    Aether: Why does anyone do anything? It’s just the circumstances of their life experiences.

    Ban: You are a fool to think you will win me over with any kind of philosophical thinking! You are a VILLAIN, and I’m telling the police everything I know!

    [The appearance of thunder is now nearly punctuating their words.]

    Aether: Tell me this Ban! Which is better: EXISTENCE or INEXISTENCE?

    Ban: Well, most people would rather live than to die!

    Aether: Which is better: BEING or BECOMING?

    Ban: Being I guess— NO! Becoming!

    Morkyzorg: Hmm… interesting choice. 

    Unbeknownst to Ban at this point in time – Aether Platinum’s nickname was Morkyzorg. You probably would have to be a member of Aether’s inner circle to know that though. 

    Morkyzorg: If you would happen upon a delicious sandwich would you share it with a friend or keep it all for yourself?

    Ban: I don’t mind sharing usually, but it probably depends on the sandwich. Maybe if you could tell me what type of sandwich specifically we can sort this out.

    Aether Platinum: Sorry, philosophy gives us no specifics. It doesn’t work that way.

    Ban: Okay I have had enough with these absurd questions! I am sincerely annoyed at what you seem to feel is DEEP thinking.

    Ban felt an energy that had him convinced Aether was ready to attack. He started to wonder if he was satisfied with the life he lived if everything ended here tonight. Ban never used guns, because it was never his intention to kill anyone in his life as a private eye. However, he always kept a small pocket knife in his boot just as a last resort means of self defense. The storm was worse than ever, and the two men stood still staring at each other, clothes soaking wet. Aether suddenly got an odd smirk on his face and his eyes changed.

    Ban felt like time slowed down, and he started envisioning the one he loved most out of everyone he ever knew in his life. His body and mind came to a sense of peace. Just as Ban snapped out of his hallucination, he saw Aether ready his weapon. Without any hesitation Bandolier Smith grabs his pocket knife, runs towards Aether Platinum and lunges at him! They spin on the ground just for a second as Ban successfully subdues Aether in a crazy quick multi combo that no one would ever believe a regular guy was capable of doing if you described it afterwards!

    Ban: You know this town won’t let you off for your crimes. Like that time you ate Sharon’s pie that she was really excited about — and that’s just an early example! That was long before you beat Harry real bad at Sidewalk Fighter 2 at the town arcade!

    Aether: I actually do feel bad for that one…

    Ban: I even directly witnessed the time you won the big TV in the raffle. The event runners maintained it was a fair raffle, but EVERYONE ELSE wanted that TV too!

    Aether: And there was that time I killed someone.

    Ban: THE TIME YOU WHAT?!

    THE END

  • WHEN HARRY MET SALLY 1989 Movie Review – Ending Explained

    Harry n Sally waz just two people. Nuttin’ really special ‘bout ‘em. Yet they got a movie! It was a film about if a man and a woman could have a PLATONIC relationship. Suddenly CRASH BOOM BANG Harry and Sally fall into a hole and now they are in PLATO’S CAVE! This is what happened next:

    Harry: Well, hey there, Sally, all I see is shadows and stuff.

    Sally:  What’s the “and stuff”?! Sally asked incredulously.

               ALL I can see is shadows.

    Harry: Good point, good point. So whatcha doing for dinner Friday night, Sally?

    Sally:  DINNER?! She again asked incredulously.

               Can’t you see we’re STUCK IN A CAVE?! 

               How are we gonna get to MICKEY DEEZ or anywhere else for that matter?!

    Harry: What’s Mickey Deez? You mean that shadow on the cave wall with the arches?

    Sally:  Harry, do you honestly not remember our lives before we fell into the hole about an hour ago?

    Harry: We had lives before these cool cave shadows?

    Sally:  Oh my god why do I even BOTHER with you, Harry?

    And then believe it or not, those two fell in love with each other.

    Ending Explained: Harry and Sally fall in love. I had a hunch it was going to end this way a little past halfway into the movie but not too close to the end.

    Final Thoughts: 7/10 Crowns. I really liked When Harry Met Sally. You know, other than that weird part where they fell into the hole and started only seeing shadows for the rest of the movie. Also, the Drinking Bird was the best character despite a very small (but pivotal!) role in the film.

    Drawma Kingg Precognition states that many will disagree with my personal analysis of the events of When Harry Met Sally. I thought I was being very fair and critical based on the PhDs I don’t have. Was my review accurate to the movie? Dis Drawma Kingg wants you to tell us what YOU think in the comments!